PALPABLE

…away from the noise, relieved of stench; amused by nothingness. All is peaceful. She holds on to her baby, a smirk of “holier than thou”. “I don’t even know her!” Then I realise: they’re all staring. I try to turn; to see what has their attention; I fail. “What’s wrong with me?”

Lucidity- I think – is being aware of one’s subconscious- Ah! Such costly pleasures! It’s pulling at my hair now; tickling my ears…like being awake through a nightmare; feeling. I suddenly know what an echo is- Echos, this time: sweet, deep bass drums, running, reverberating in my head…on and on…

…I hate circles; there’s no point! But my head likes them, it seems, for I see the same things over again; feel things in circles…now, a man stands over me, looking more closely at me than the others. I’m scared: “don’t touch me!” But he does; with a friend.

First my head, then my arms; all warming up. “Shall it hurt?” I look around. They do not see him. Or his friend. Only me. Just me.

…he whispers his name. I’d rather not listen. But he beats it in. On those fearful drums. Echo by echo. I know it now. His name is odd: Pain.

Like a military procession, he gives way to his friend. This one’s arms are cold. His eyes are blank; he’s done this before. “Don’t touch me!” But he does. A great deal.

She sees them, now. She holds her little one even closer. I know his name. But she won’t let me touch him, play with him. Not while these ones are here.

…he continues touching; defiling; toturing me. Now I remember. I know him. Quite well. A smug smile on his blank face, having forced me to remember…this one is dark: Death.

They match now. Leave. Accomplished. Aware of my knowledge. I grin at them. My teeth are stained. Not with food, not drink, not flesh, nor bread. Creamy. Chocolatey, too. No word was formed for this grit on my teeth. But one. Victory. The name of her baby. Now I know. Now she smiles, too.

Be not surprised, yet, gape in awe! I am male- and female. I know you. I know all. I am Humanity.

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